Tag Archives: psychology

A Sweet Aroma

The Christian lives as a sacrifice before God daily, as did Jesus. It is our reflection of His grace that we expend ourselves in His service and service to others. As we die a bit more day by day or are crushed by the world little by little, we have the opportunity to pour out our gratitude and love for God and neighbor. As like the Old Testament sacrifices, we are thus a sweet aroma pleasing unto Him. This follows from nature that in the same manner that spices and incense give off more and more of their flavor/aroma as they are burned or crushed so do we in our sufferings unto God. This is why murmuring and complaining in such circumstances is not befitting the true Christian. Psalm 44:22, Romans 8:36, Psalm 116:15, 2 Cor. 2:14-15, Eph. 5:1-2.

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The best business advice

As Jesus was teaching/preaching, a man was churning something over and over in his mind that had nothing to do with the sermon at hand, much like some do during modern church services.

“Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” But he said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” And he said to them, “Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” And he told them a parable, saying, “The land of a rich man produced plentifully, 17 and he thought to himself, ‘What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?’ 18 And he said, ‘I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. 19 And I will say to my soul, “Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.”’ 20 But God said to him, ‘Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?’ 21 So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.””

Luke 12:13-21

Jesus takes the opportunity to make what was a disruption into a famous teaching moment. This is the best advice I can think of for all business persons.

Materialism distracts us from recognizing that God gives us the increases we receive in life, yet somehow this businessman/farmer was able to look past all that God had done to bring about his abundant crops, and could only see himself and his security in that wealth. Yet the bigger problem was not his lack of space to hold it all, or really that he had to come up with a plan to resolve his storage problem. His biggest issue was that in all his life’s work and planning, he never took time to make God a part of his plans.

It’s the thought that you can always get to God later in life once you’ve taken care of your material needs. The Devil rarely tries to convince people that God’s not real or that there is not pending judgement day. The Devil’s best tactic is to convince people that there is always room to get right with God, tomorrow. Business people have so much going on, that if you could poll all of them in one day, I bet there would be a majority that would similarly say they can always accept God tomorrow. But just like the parable, and the population being what it is, the odds are that a few of those same business people will not make it to tomorrow. Worse still are those materialistic people that business people feed into and off of, stats say there are more of those who are betting on tomorrow but will not see the next sunrise. Further in the New Testament, James hits the nail on the head in the advice he is giving:

“Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”

James 4:13-17

To bet on tomorrow is and will be a losing bet for someone today. Don’t let that person be you, work to be rich toward God and seek the Lord while he may be found.

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Post postmodern church

The post-postmodern church will be a customized app so your “worship” time is customized and privatized by/to you. You set up a portfolio icon/image and discuss things with other members via chat and prayer rooms separated by age groups. Select a pastor from the menu according to the style and intensity you like. The sermons are then tweeted live at a certain time each week so that members can interact with them via likes or evangelically share them. If you don’t catch it live, you can always read it according to your own schedule. Periods of worship music are set aside before and after the sermon, but the app will allow you to bypass the preselected songs/hymns to access your our playlist so you can listen to what worship music suits you. Communion will be a clickable action for your icon to participate in as it’s symbolic anyway. The offering is more of an in-app purchase, where you can select a cause for it to go to, with just a % going to the church. 

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Personal Guidance: knowing God’s Will

There is such a huge desire in this age for personal guidance. From life coaches, self-assessments, and counselors all the way up to wanting to know the will of God, people want to be told who they are, what they are good at and thus what they should do with their life (so as to be successful). This is typically a big picture idea, and larger than life goal setting. Day-to-day decisions about what to eat, wear and watch on TV are not usually in view, unless they are the mundane things in life that make a person unhappy or are holding him back from their true potential.

According to Jay Adams, Christian author/minister/psychologist, there are two categories of people that would say the Bible is insufficient to provide such guidance. The first are those who would say, “Scripture has nothing to say about everyday decision making.” To these the Bible is outdated and just does not speak to our modern way of life. This group finds it is easier to make decisions based on logical or pragmatic reasoning, where what is perceived to be in “my best interest” or expedient right now is what leads them into the decisions they make, daily and in life. The second group (more popular in Christian circles) is more mystical than skeptical, as these would say, “Scripture does speak about the everyday, but it’s easier to rely on, or supplement scripture with dreams, my feelings, or interpreting circumstances.” People in this second camp are big on “putting out the fleece”, or making statements like, “I felt led to …” or “God put it on my heart to …” I believe the Bible is sufficient for all everyday decisions, and our life decisions, within the limits of what the Bible permits, and then allows for our personal differences.

The Bible (and therefore God) speaks to and counsels us both directly and indirectly. Scripture is not a catalog of every do and don’t do that a person will face in life. The Bible does have both specific and general principles, in the context of people and situations, which serve as examples of things applicable to anyone and any time-period.

Getting down to the nuts and bolts of things, it is not easy to find Scriptural guidance about what car to buy, job to take or who to marry, so there is confusion.

Those who rely on “the Lord led me to …” approach are usually speaking of some means exterior to the Bible (I personally refer to this as the “Magic 8 Ball” method). Years ago, these exterior means would be called divination or superstition by which someone has gained access to the secret counsel of God. Worse, people would claim that God spoke to them directly. These persons would either be seen as mad/crazy or be executed for such practices, although today these things have passed into everyday acceptable practices. In short, what is wrong with this approach is that guidance should never be apart from the Bible. The Bible is “sufficient” (recommend doing a study on the sufficiency of Scripture, as it is a fading doctrine in some Christian circles). The Bible covers all the principles and practices of life. It really does! It may take us getting off our lazy butts to read, research, make comparisons, evaluate the context and stuff we trust our pastor to do, but it is every Christian’s job, too. There are plenty of direct imperatives (commands) of God about things known to avoid (at what times and why) and there are just as many if not more indirect implications of what we are to do in a variety of circumstances. Some may ask, “But what about those “Led by the Spirit” passages (Rom 8:14, Gal 5:8). In context, both passages are not discussing decision-making, but are speaking of the motivation of the Spirit to live the Christian life in our sanctification. Even if either was speaking of Spirit leading, other passages give the fuller context that the Spirit works via the Word (Heb 10:15).

Let’s get back to a practical example: Marriage. Everyone wants to know infallibly who to marry and are so paranoid about getting it wrong that they will go to great ends to ensure God confirms it. First the Bible’s counsel is that celibacy is a fine and acceptable way of life (Gen 2:18, Matthew 19, 1 Cor. 7). Did you know the Bible was the first to ordain the status of singleness to such a stature? In cultures of the time, it was offensive or an embarrassment to one’s family if a guy or gal did not marry. Everyone is born single and so is, in a sense, gifted with singleness up to the point that they are married. We have a direct command that we are only to marry in the Lord (1 Cor. 7:39). Believers are to heed this command as intended by God to be the spiritual protection of both parties in the covenant relationship. Then we have much more indirect counsel from Scripture when our marriage choice should be spiritual maturity, attending church regularly, holding to sound doctrine, be clean, not be lazy, and several other general qualities of a godly mate. Once narrowed down to any acceptable choices that remain (say for a guy three gals fit the above equally) it is flat wrong to ask then, which is “God’s will?” It is God’s will to marry according to the exclusion of all wrong choices. We can correctly speak of God’s will after the marriage has occurred, that God willed you to marry who you did simply because it occurred, as God has ordained whatever comes to pass.

To seek out God’s directive will, take the time to dig through scripture and establish the parameters for decisions as He has laid them out. Once all parameters are set (not excluding the unpopular ones) see what options remain, and if there are multiple choices still, then there is freedom to pursue one, according to preference. It is wrong to consider one of three remaining “good” choices as wrong, or sinful. Think of all the many pieces of bread offered in communion, and yet one is predestined for you, yet the others are not sinful, we can only speak of which piece was eternally meant for you after you have eaten it. Until you ate the bread, all of the pieces were holy and good and available to choose.

Example 1: The color of a shirt to wear is not a morally right or wrong choice, unless there are other factors, such as occasion, modesty, offence, etc.

Example 2: A pastor receives a call to two churches, one in New York and one in India. Neither can be a wrong or sinful choice, and so there may be a preference.

Back to the marriage example: if left with more than one choice, we cannot say definitively which one God wills you to marry, but only that God does direct that you marry a girl “like” those that remain in the running (having passed through all the parameters that Scripture forbids about marriage). There may be a preference of one gal over the others, or simply some of them may not share your affection.

When the remaining choices are numerous we should trust God, in faith, that we may happily choose any of the remaining options. We must not add to God’s counsel, our own personal superstitions or attempts to divine beyond Scripture more parameters than we are given. The fleeces, casting of lots, and other tricks must go.

Bigger in the evangelical churches is the attempt to trust ourselves with being in direct contact with God such that He will guide us via our feelings or circumstances. We must not rely on trying to interpret circumstances because we do not know and cannot tip God’s hand in such ways. The fleece or closed/open door just does not work. You may think it works just because having used it before you did not suffer any ill effects or the issue went away. This is not a valid/scriptural way to be led by God and can be very dangerous. When this method is used, you are left with hundreds of interpretive difficulties, many of which are whitewashed away because it’s easiest to hone in on the choice you really want to hear. Say someone is seeking to be a missionary to India and yet his church’s mission board says no. They have had a warm fuzzy feeling about God leading them into missions for over a year. How should this person interpret this seemingly “closed door” when they were so certain God was leading them to do this? Here are just a few interpretations one could consider.
1. Maybe God is saying no?
2. Maybe God is saying not now?
3. Maybe more training is necessary first?
4. Maybe God is testing your sincerity and perseverance to try again?
5. Maybe God is just saying not India?
6. Maybe God wants me to go it alone without the approval of some missionary board?
7. Maybe God is showing me this is the wrong denomination to be asking?

The same problem of interpretation of circumstances exists with positive (open doors) things in life. Being presented with various opportunities that are financially profitable are not always the right choices. As Jay Adams states, “Some open doors lead to elevator shafts.” Warm fuzzy feeling of God via wherever the wind is blowing in my favor only leaves people delusional about what God really wants. Get married because it just felt right, as opposed to all the direction discussed above and when things fall apart we will question if we heard God correctly. Many take the opportunity to just not be happy as their out, and will say that although God led them into a marriage, He is now leading them out of the marriage and on to someone/ something else. God DOES open and close various doors and circumstances, but these are not to be our guides in life. We follow Him. The same can be said for feelings, urges, convictions, having peace, leadings, etc. Each have some unrecognized or self-reason behind them that may or may not be biblical, but are hardly thought out. We all want peace about life, and in the decisions we make, but ultimately our peace is with God, and as such, if He leads us through the valley of the shadow of death, we are not to say no, just because it’s not the peace we are looking for. Some biblical choices and counsel is hard to accept and may lead to difficulties in and with this life. But if this life is not our focus, then what guidance are we really looking for?

Jay Adams coins “The Holding Principle” which he bases on Romans 14:23. This principle is to – Never act until you are sure that what you are about to do is NOT sin. If you have done the hard work, and set all your parameters and something is still in question, sit and hold it and dwell on it a little longer. Anything that raises doubt or scruples in your mind is something to wait on, think and pray about prior to making that decision. We are to be “fully convinced in our own mind” that what we are doing is right and right before God (Rom 14:15b). We may miss out on eating some good meat, or a lucrative business opportunity, but if God is glorified in our decision, at least we can confirm that we are not condemned for having sinned carelessly, selfishly, or maliciously (Rom 14:23).

I see so many bad decisions being made, which are usually based on really bad insight and with little to no biblical direction in mind. I really hope and pray this helps you with how you view decision making within your Christian walk.

– See the book “A Theology of Christian Counseling” by Jay Adams for more insight and details.

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Modesty

Modesty is a taboo topic because it sounds restrictive to a world that wants the most options with the least amount of limitations. Least of all, no one wants to be told how to dress. So why is the Bible so counter cultural on this point? Is it just that old of a book or when God states we are to be modest (1 Cor. 12:23, 1 Tim. 2:9, and other passages about not uncovering the nakedness of someone) , that there are really good, meaningful and loving advice behind the restriction?

Sorry I don’t have time to develop this into a fuller blog post, but just wanted to bullet my points.

Modesty protects you and others from being emotionally harmed by a false sense and portrayal of intimacy.

Modesty prevents having to maintain anything or anyone gained through being revealing.

Modesty now conceals that which fades later.

Modesty helps others like you for who you are holistically.

Modesty to God is of the heart, not just a fashion choice or quantity of fabric.

Modesty is a restraint to not let our eyes and thoughts go farther than they ought, or wrongly invite the eyes and thoughts of others to go farther then they ought.

Modesty has others in mind, not wishing to lead others astray.

Modesty hides from all what is rightly preserved for one.

Modesty protects you from greedily wanting the affection of those who are not yours.

Modesty forces a relationship to be based on the whole person and not just someone’s looks.

Modesty is an issue for all ages and both genders.

To use immodesty to say you have to attract a mate is to supersede God’s ability to find you one.

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Prayer: Doctrine and Doing

Prayer and Doing

Jay Adams talks about three common questions he used in counseling: “What is your problem: What have you done about it: What do you expect me to do about it?” In his experience the second question is typically a one word answer, “Prayer”.

As discussed in a prior post prayer does not shift or punt the problems of life to God. There is no shift of the problem to God and thus you are free to go about daily life, except to maybe pray more, and wait.

We are foolish to expect God’s answer to prayer to drop from the sky or be some audible answer.  Adams uses the example of eating.  We are taught in the “Lord’s Prayer” to pray, “Give us this day our daily bread”… and yet none of us, if we expect to eat, sit and wait for a bag of fast food to drop out of the sky.  2 Thess. 3:10 further teaches us that if a man refuses to work, then he should also not be fed.  This all seems to clearly indicate that there is more to our problems than just prayer. There needs to be action that accompanies the prayer.  Prayer is only the beginning point of dealership with a problem.

Philippians 4:6-9 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”

Typically we read verses 6 and 7 and say “There it is, I just need to ask for peace and I should get it”. So many Christians seem to be praying for peace in life these days and are not getting it, why is that?  Could it be because we have neglected to read on in context?  In verses 8 and 9 Paul gives us some bold things to do in striving to attain that peace.  We are to work on changing our thinking and check what are right and wrong thoughts.  We are to actively emulate Paul and he is only emulating Christ.  There is nothing about waiting until you get peace until you start to do these.  We are to be doing them within and during the pursuit of peace. Paul qualifies in verse 9 that we are not to be seeking peace so much that we neglect that God is the God of peace, and that it is ultimately Him that we have gained in our salvation, and not just a self achieved personal peace of mind.  In short prayer is just step one, of actively working towards anything you are praying about. If all you are doing is praying about something, maybe it’s time to start taking part in doing.  

The Christian Doctrine of Prayer:

In the simplest and most correct form I know of I wish to present the ACTS model of praying. In other words the word ACTS is really an acronym for recalling elements of prayer the Bible gives us.

Adoration is the first word of the acronym. Thanking God for more than what He gives, but for who and what He is. The adoration is lacking when it centers on what God gives and our current feelings about our current life situation. We may struggle with contentment about life in general, but we should always be far more than content and even ecstatic that we have the One true God looking out for us.

Confession is the word making up the next letter of the acronym. In general it is saying the same thing, about ourselves that God has revealed about us in His word. Because the Christian is in Christ and free from the judgment to come, he can honestly confess sin when he has committed it, and return and talk to God about it.

Thanksgiving is the third word of the acronym. Thanksgiving is the Christians expression of gratefulness in all things that no matter what our losses are, the Christian will not drift or float away into utter despair because he is anchored to the thankfulness of salvation in Christ.

Supplications is the last word from this acronym. It is simply making our requests be made known to God (I’ll get into more details about this in a future post).

Reference:

Adams, Jay E. A Theology of Christian Counseling.Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1979.

Prayer: Doctrine and Doing.

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False Ideas about Prayer

I wanted to address in this post some of the false notions of prayer that are common in today’s world.

First is the psychological shifting of perceived weight; which is therapeutic projection of letting go and letting God, cast your cares upon Him. In this type of prayer God is more like a metaphysical closet to hide/ dump your burden in, or try to disown them.  This kind of prayer is just a psychological exercise of venting and doesn’t really have to do with God at all.  The mental health secular world can in this context encourage people to pray and yet not care if there is really a God or not. It is just the act of doing it that is the therapy.  Yet this is truly insulting to the person and work of Christ.

People are in trouble when trusting in the “act” of prayer rather than the God to which they are supposed to be praying. It is not a subjective experience of feelings or a magical solution should you get the form and content just right. 

It is also wrong to think that praying is only useful in conforming man’s inward heart to God’s, and not really impacting the world.  Now I do believe that this occurs (Prayer will change our hearts), but I do not believe this to the exclusion of God using and working in and through prayer.  God is not fate, but really and personally listens to the prayers of His people (more about God’s hearing and listening in the next post).

Prayer is not the same as petition only. It is meant to be a heartfelt communicating about more than just the need or desire to ask for things.  Think of a close relationship (spouse, BF/GF, close friend, etc.) and what it would be like for you if the only time the person spoke to you was to ask for you to do something for them.  I don’t think such a relationship would last very long in human terms.

Prayer is not the same as Eastern or even Christian meditation. Transcendental meditation is to let your mind wander into unconsciousness, and Christian meditation is to reflect upon passages of God’s word seeing freely thinking about how those passages intersect with life and other thoughts that come to mind, but this is not prayer (although I admit it could lead to prayer).   

I must say that I also disagree with the Catholic notion of prayers to saints, as if the direct access to God in Christ is somehow obstructed, and the saints provide some other avenue of approach.  Is Christ too busy for the prayers of all Christendom? To the degree that a saint has the power, attributes, or inside track on some benefit then it is subverting the authority and honor of Christ who teaches plainly that all men are to come to Him.  The living would hardly suggest that any man should pray to another man, so why is this somehow different in death? 

Stay tuned for more.

Reference: Adams, Jay E. A Theology of Christian Counseling. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1979.

 

False Ideas about Prayer.

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